Arachnid-Dude - Directed by Jacob Shelton

For most of the last decade, every snotty, crdigan-wearing lump with a more than three Blu-Rays (note to editor: please update this reference if a new form of physical media is created between now and when/if the article is posted) from the Criterion Collection has cried foul over the increased abundance of superhero films, their sequels, and films that aren’t quite superhero films or their sequels but feel as if they could use at least one iron man. But are these film school brats correct in chiding viewers and artists alike for acquiescing to the will of international conglomerates who make their money off of the spider-men of the world? Or are they lying about there being any original content? Who are they to say if there were any ideas before the first Batman ziplined his way across the silver screen and into our hearts?

I’m truly asking because I’ve been buried under this stack of Captain America: The First Avenger DVDs (note to editor: will people understand what DVDs are? Should we change it to Blu Rays? I didn’t want the article to read as repetitive. Did The First Avenger even come out on DVD? If only you could be buried under digital downloads we’d be in the clear. Now that’s a funny visual – a man buried underneath a pile of digital downloads. “How does that even work?” The audience asks.) and Stan Lee is whispering in my ear, “You love this, dear reader. Excelsior.”